<HTML> <HEAD> <META HTTP-EQUIV="Content-Type" CONTENT="text/html; charset=windows-1252"> <META NAME="Generator" CONTENT="Internet Assistant for Word Version 3.0"> </HEAD> <BODY> <B><I><U><FONT FACE="Arial" SIZE=2><P>Synopsis:</B></I></U> Quinn is on the hunt for a steady boyfriend, while at the same time trying to find out why Sandi has gone so cold towards the Fashion Club. Daria finds out that Trent and Tom have gotten in a fight, and discovers a side to “The Tom Thing” that she hadn’t before. And Helen plans a reconciliation dinner with Tom, only to have Jake and a squirrel bring the whole thing toppling down.</P> <B><I><U> <P>Author’s Forward:</B></I></U> I am rating the following story PG-13 for content. The subject matter deals with teen pregnancy. I am not an advocate of teen pregnancy, and firmly believe that common sense should prevail in such cases. However, real life being what it is, this is not always the case.</P> <P>&#9;The following story was written for entertainment purposes only, and <I><U>should not </I></U>be taken as educational material. I do not claim that the “technical” aspects of my story are even remotely accurate. If you have any questions, go to a responsible adult knowledgeable in the appropriate areas.</P> <B><I><U><P>Other Notes:</B></I></U> The author assumes that the reader is familiar with “Daria” and the characters therein, and has read my previous stories. This story is seventh in the series and takes place concurrent with the events portrayed in “One J At A Time.”</P> <B><I><U><P>Legal Drek</B></I></U>: Daria and her cohorts are property of MTV and Viacom.</P> <P>This story is Copyright October 23, 2004.</P> <B> </B></FONT><FONT FACE="Stereo" SIZE=4><P>&nbsp;</P> </FONT><FONT FACE="Stereo" SIZE=5><P ALIGN="CENTER">Daria</P> <P ALIGN="CENTER"></P> <P ALIGN="CENTER">in</P> <P ALIGN="CENTER"></P> <P ALIGN="CENTER">A Tale of Two T</FONT><FONT FACE="Arial" SIZE=5>’</FONT><FONT FACE="Stereo" SIZE=5>s</P> </FONT><FONT FACE="Arial" SIZE=2><P ALIGN="CENTER">By Greystar</P> <B> </B><P ALIGN="CENTER">~~~Monday~~~</P> <I><P>Finally,</I> Daria mused as she sat at the kitchen table. <I>Finally, finally, finally things are getting back to normal around here. ‘Normal’ being a relative term, of course. I’m pregnant, mom’s on a forced vacation, and dad’s only slightly less touchy than usual. It could always be worse, I suppose.</P> </I><P>Daria glanced around the kitchen and hoped that her wandering thoughts wouldn’t be the catalyst that would incur one Mr. Murphy’s most famous law. So far, though, that didn’t seem to be the case. Jake was at the kitchen island, shoveling some kind of odd looking sauce from a pan onto a large bowl full of noodles, while Helen and Daria sat at the table, listening to Quinn talk about something she had seen on television.</P> <P>Helen, for the first time in three weeks, wore her more casual clothes and looked more relaxed than she had in a long time. She seemed to be enjoying her leave of absence from the law firm, a leave taken when Eric put her on the spot, and asked which was more important: her job or her family. Helen had made the right choice, leaving Eric high and dry. She also figured that she deserved the time off, after coming out the victor in a hard-fought, and almost massively bungled, child-support case against the Sloane family. That case had also yanked up a deeply buried part of her sister Amy’s past.</P> <P>Daria’s Aunt Amy, for her part, had returned home for a few days seeking a vacation from her self-appointed job assisting Daria when help was needed. She needed time to get her own head back together and deal with loose ends of her life had cropped up over the last few months back home. Amy promised to be back after ten days or so, and Jane had gave her word to look after Daria in Amy’s stead, which Jane would have done anyway.</P> <P>“So, anyway, this new FashionVision series, <I>Behind the Untold Stories of the Supermodels</I>, reveals what their lives were like when they were just plain models,” Quinn was explaining to Daria and Helen.</P> <P>Daria’s return comment was preempted by Jake proudly dropping the big bowl of noodles and sauce onto the middle of the table. Helen and Quinn looked at the concoction with trepidation. Daria felt her stomach curl up in a ball at the sight of . . . whatever it was.</P> <P>“Thai Peanut Sauce a la Jake is complete-o!” Jake smiled with pride at his latest culinary masterpiece. “Who wants the first bite?”</P> <P>“You pick, mom. It’ll be like <I>Sophie’s Choice</I>,” Daria said. <I>Or maybe </I>Schindler’s List<I> would be more appropriate.</P> </I><P>“Don’t worry, this is a whole different recipe from the last batch,” Jake said as he dropped a large spoonful of noodles and sauce on Quinn’s plate. She just regarded the pile with a wrinkled nose and scrunched eyebrows.</P> <P>“Jake, I thought we talked about this. Daria can’t handle some of the things that you try to make.” Helen said with a critical look at dinner. “Besides, the last time you made this, it took three days to get the smell out of the house.”</P> <P>“Experiment with a little wasabi and the whole world’s a critic,” Jake sighed, looking at the ceiling, then back at his wife. “Dammit, Helen, you can’t make an omelet without breaking a few eggs!”</P> <P>“Can I have an omelet?” Daria asked hopefully, though her voice didn’t show it.</P> <P>“No, the last thing that you need is the cholesterol,” Helen said flatly.</P> <P>“Then how about some eggs to break?”</P> <P>“<I>Anyway</I>,” Quinn butted back in. “They were just about to show Veronique’s make-up bag from high school when the delivery guy rang the door bell with Daria’s package,” Quinn said with a dejected shrug. “What is with those brown uniforms?”</P> <P>Daria looked up from the large helping of noodles and sauce that Jake had deposited on her plate.</P> <P>“Quinn, this package? Did it run away by itself or hop a lonesome freight train west?”</P> <P>“Oh, it’s out in the living room somewhere,” Quinn said with a wave in the general direction of that part of the house. “Now I’m never going to find out what was in that make-up bag!”</P> <P>Daria allowed herself about a tenth of a second’s grief for her sister before she pushed herself away from the table. Jake was dishing up and sitting down as Daria walked away from the table. She noticed that it was taking more effort to pull herself up out of a chair recently. Sooner or later, she’d need assistance just to get up, and she didn’t want to think about what a typical day at school was going to be like at all.</P> <P>Spotting her package on the table by the door, Daria went to pick it up. The return address was the Sloane’s, with Tom’s name on it. Her curiosity piqued, Daria opened the envelope with her thumb as she walked back towards the kitchen. Reaching inside she pulled out a large hardbound book, its title lettered in slightly battered gold leaf: <I><U>Three Hundred Years of Verse</I></U>,</P> <I><P>Wow, </I>Daria thought. <I>He actually found it.</P> </I><P>“EWWW! Dad’s sick!” Quinn yowled in disgust from the kitchen, breaking into Daria‘s thoughts.</P> <P>Daria looked up and frowned. Apparently, Jake had tried to eat his own cooking. Daria then went back to reading her book.</P> <P>Daria remembered seeing this particular book in a movie she had once watched with Tom very early on in their relationship. The next day, they had tried to locate the collection of poetry at the library and at the local book stores. Lawndale being what it was, they were unable to find anything.</P> <P>“What is <I>that?”</I> Quinn’s voice once again intruded into Daria’s thoughts as she drifted back into the kitchen.</P> <P>“My people call them books,” Daria said as she flipped open the cover and skimmed the title page. “Hunh. A first edition. Tom must have found it on the Web.”</P> <P>“Oh, how sweet!” Helen exclaimed as she removed a rock-hard lasagna from the freezer. She put the frozen tray on the counter and looked at the book over Daria’s shoulder for a moment.</P> <P>“He bought you a <I>used</I> book?” Quinn said. “What kind of boyfriend <I>is </I>he?”</P> <P>“The kind of boyfriend who knows what’s important to Daria,” Helen said as she put the frozen tray in the oven and turned the heat to about four-fifty.</P> <P>“Great, now I’m sick,” Daria groaned.</P> <P>Behind the two women, Jake continued to pour the contents of his failed dinner into the trash. He had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from going off at the mention of Tom Sloane. He had promised Helen that he would try and give the boy a break, but if was damn difficult. In his anger, Jake shook the bowl a little too hard and noodles splattered over the side of the trash can. Jake bit his cheek harder and picked the noodles off the floor without saying anything.</P> <P>“Lots of guys care about me, you know,” Quinn was saying. “I don’t know why anybody would settle for just one.”</P> <P>“Excuse me?” Daria looked up from her book and gave Quinn a cold stare. “Care to elaborate on that?”</P> <P>“Uh, well, I don’t mean for <I>that</I>,” Quinn stammered, realizing what she’d just said. “I mean, well -- you know what I mean, Daria!”</P> <P>“Fortunately for you, yes,” Daria said icily. Quinn sheepishly turned back to the table and took a sip of water to wash the taste of her foot out of her mouth.</P> <P>“Quinn, it’s a special thing to find someone so compatible that you want to, uh, <I>see</I> them exclusively, among, uh, other things.” Helen got a cold eye from her eldest daughter, but continued. “Anyway, having a steady boyfriend takes maturity and perspective!”</P> <P>“Really,” Daria said dryly. Helen slumped.</P> <P>“But, I’m mature!” Quinn whined as she turned around in her chair.</P> <P>“Yeah, and you’ve got the teddy bear earrings to prove it. Which reminds me, can I borrow them? They go so well with my lack of credibility around here.”</P> <P>“Daria, you’re right. I’m sorry.” Helen sighed. “We really haven’t had a chance to make up to you and Tom for everything that’s happened. Why don’t you invite him over for dinner?”</P> <P>“Because I haven’t taken complete leave of my senses,” Daria replied as she closed her book.</P> <P>“Can I bring a boyfriend too?” Quinn asked hopefully.</P> <P>In his corner of the kitchen, Jake let the bowl slip from his fingers and land on the counter top with a loud <I>clunk!</I> All three Morgendorffer women looked in his direction with varying degrees of curiosity. Jake frowned and made himself very busy tying the top of the trash bag closed.</P> <P>“If and when you have a steady boyfriend,” Helen said slowly, turning back to Quinn. “We’d love to have him for dinner.”</P> <P>“Do we have to dip him in that peanut sauce before we eat him?” Daria asked blandly.</P> <P>“Hey!” Jake stood up, indignantly pulling the trash bag from the can.</P> <P>“So, what night would be good for Tom?” Helen asked, ignoring Jake for the moment.</P> <P>“Anytime after Armageddon is fine.”</P> <P>“Sheesh!” Jake threw his free hand in the air and started for the laundry room door. “I slave all day over a hot stove and for what?”</P> <P>Daria looked sidelong at her mother and waited until Jake had definitely left the room.</P> <P>“It’s to keep him off the streets, right?”</P> <P ALIGN="CENTER">~~~Tuesday~~~</P> <P>“So, explain to me why we’re walking to school?” Jane asked as she and Daria were walking down the sidewalk the next morning. “I thought Tom’s been driving you these days, what with your condition and all.”</P> <P>“He said his car was in the shop when I called him this morning,” Daria replied. “It ought to be fixed in a few days, which should be all the time I need to talk mom out of having him over for dinner.”</P> <P>“What’s she planning to serve with him? White wine goes so well with human flesh.” Jane said with a smirk, then looked at the expression her friend was giving her. “Sorry. So your mother actually invited him over for dinner?”</P> <P>“I know, some workaholic. I think this leave of absence is getting to her. She seems to think she has to make it up to Tom and me for all the crap they’ve put us through.”</P> <P>“Once your father gets started on military school, the evening will be over before it begins,” Jane said with a shake of her head. It seemed that Helen might actually be coming around. Too bad the same couldn’t be said for Jake.</P> <P>“What I’m afraid of is a blood bath, not just a spoiled evening.”</P> <P>“What?” Jane looked over at Daria. “You’re worried about more than just simple embarrassment here, aren‘t you?”</P> <P>“Any time the subject of Tom gets mentioned, you can see my dad‘s hackles go up.” Daria brought them both to a stop and turned to face Jane. “Up until recently, he’s been following Tom and me whenever he drives me to school. Every time Quinn goes out on a date, he’s on them like a KGB interrogator. I mean, you saw how he was on the stand in court.”</P> <P>“Hmm, I guess I see your point.”</P> <P>“Tom deserves better than a night of verbal abuse.” Daria resumed walking and Jane fell in step beside her without effort. “I know that mom’s trying to make things better, but . . .”</P> <P>“You’re afraid that your dad’s just going to make things worse?” Jane asked.</P> <P>“I’m afraid that he’s not even going to try,” Daria shrugged. “Tom’s been the one making all the effort and all Dad seems to be doing is trying to drive him off.”</P> <P>“Don’t worry about Tom, he’s tougher than he looks,” Jane said, not believing that she was actually saying it. “Besides, he never had any problems at all with my parents.”</P> <P>“He’s never met your parents,” Daria pointed out.</P> <P>“Yeah, there is that.” Jane was quiet for a moment. “I don’t suppose that you could convince your father to go off to Greece for six months to sketch the sunsets?”</P> <P>“Not likely.”</P> <P>“You could be blowing this whole thing out of proportion, you know.”</P> <P>“Proportion. I get it.” Daria looked down at her stomach, which she thought she could see pushing against the inside of her jacket, and sighed.</P> <P>“Daria . . .”</P> <P>“Maybe you’re right. Maybe my dad’ll be relatively calm and collected and the evening will go smoothly and a good time will be had by all.” Daria’s tone of voice, however, suggested that she expected pigs to take wing long before that happened.</P> <P>“You’re going to ‘forget’ to tell Tom and hope this whole thing goes away, aren’t you?” Jane asked, though she suspected that she already knew the answer.</P> <P>“Believe me, Jane,” Daria put her hand on her stomach. “If it was possible, I would have already forgotten.”</P> <P ALIGN="CENTER">~~~~~~</P> <P>“So, what is the current situation with Ms. Morgendorffer?” Angela Li asked, looking up from the folder open on her desk.</P> <P>Dr. Margaret Manson, psychologist and councilor for Lawndale High looked down at the last folder on her lap and opened it.</P> <P>“The Morgendorffer girl seems to be dipping somewhat from her established baseline of behavior.” Manson pulled her glasses down her nose slightly. “Going by information gathered in our previous sessions, it would indicate that she is becoming less defensive than normal.”</P> <P>“Could this signal a general shift in her attitude?” Li asked, making notes.</P> <P>“Perhaps,” Manson said slowly.</P> <P>“For the better?” Li asked with a pointedly raised eyebrow.</P> <P>“Not necessarily, Angela.” Manson was cautious. Li’s ideas about what kinds of attitudes the students should maintain for the good of the school were rather specific. “While Ms Morgendorffer’s previous aberrant behavior --”</P> <P>“Margaret, I’ll not have the harmonious learning environment that I’ve tried to establish around here be disrupted by non-conformists and malcontents.” Li made more notes in her folder. “Perhaps a trip through Mr. O’Neill’s Self Esteem Workshop would be beneficial to Ms Morgendorffer.”</P> <P>“Are you sure that Mr. O’Neill is equipped to handle this?”</P> <P>“Hm. Perhaps you’re right. Adjust your schedule to accommodate the workshop.” Li was about to continue, but stopped suddenly when she heard the door to her office open.</P> <P>“I’m sorry, am I interrupting something?” Helen Morgendorffer asked as she stepped into the room.</P> <P>“Good afternoon, Mrs. Morgendorffer! No, not at all!” Li quickly slapped the folder in front of her closed and stuffed it under the pile of similar folders off to her side. Manson closed her own and covered it with her hands, though more sedately. “Merely discussing school policy matters.”</P> <P>“Yes, of course,” Helen said as she walked up to Ms Li’s desk. She didn’t buy her fake cheerfulness for a second. “If you have a few minutes, there’s something I’d like to talk to you about. Regarding school policy, actually.”</P> <P>“Mrs. Morgendorffer,” Li said as Helen started going through her briefcase. “I am actually quite busy, as you can see, and matters of school policy are best brought up before the school board.”</P> <P>“More specifically, having to do with <I>your </I>policy regarding students attending classes under special circumstances.” Helen went on as though Ms. Li had never spoken. She pulled out a folder and looked it over once as she took the empty chair beside Manson.</P> <P>“Really.”</P> <P>“Yes, for example, whereas a particular female student has become pregnant. There is a wide range of physical and hormonal changes that she would be going through that would make it inappropriate for her to be performing certain activities. Also her teachers would have to be advised that certain . . . assignments may not be appropriate material for a particular amount of time.”</P> <P>“Really,” Li said again.</P> <P>“You sound like you claim to be an expert in these things, Mrs. Morgendorffer,” Manson said, looking over her glasses at Helen.</P> <P>“Well, I have given birth to two daughters.” Helen cocked her eyebrow at Manson. “Actually, I’m surprised that you hadn’t brought these subjects to Ms Li’s attention, Dr. Manson.”</P> <P>“I’m a psychologist, madam, not a teacher. I’m not privy to what the faculty assigns the students over the course of the semester.”</P> <P>“Well, Ms Li is.” Helen turned back to the principal with a cold look. “And I would think that she would be a little more tactful in the special assignments that she hands out.”</P> <P>“Now, really, Mrs. Morgendorffer,” Li began to say. “I don’t believe that --”</P> <P>“For example, this assignment given to my daughter in order to maintain her physical education requirements.” Helen held up the folder and opened it up to the synopsis page on top. “‘Write an editorial article on the failure of the scholastic sexual education system to prevent teen aged pregnancy and reduce promiscuity among teens. Include your personal views on how these changes to the system could have assisted in preventing your current condition and preventing others from making similar mistakes in the future.’ Care to explain?”</P> <P>“That assignment is meant to maintain the student’s grade point average in Physical Education, as well as educate the readers of our school newspaper to what may be gaps in our scholastic system.”</P> <P>“‘<I>Your </I>personal views,’ ‘<I>your </I>current condition,’“ Helen repeated.</P> <P>“It is an editorial, after all. The reporter is intended to include their personal opinions.”</P> <P>“Ms. Li, this assignment was specifically tailored to draw undue, negative attention to Daria in what I believe to be the first moves in a blatant attempt to force her out of Lawndale High.”</P> <P>“Mrs. Morgendorffer, I can assure you that is not --”</P> <P>“I’ve spoken with Carrie Landingham. And her parents.” Helen fixed Li with a glare. “That is <I>exactly</I> what you are attempting to do. State policy forbids outright suspension in these circumstances, and you are trying to worm your way around it. Again.”</P> <P>“Mrs. Morgendorffer,” Li said slowly as she drew herself up in her chair. “Your daughter getting pregnant sets a horrendous example to her fellow female students that must be quashed at once! I have no intention of seeing Lawndale High become a teenage obstetrics ward!”</P> <P>“Let me put this another way, Ms Li,” Helen said, slowly standing up and leaning on the edge of the desk to look down at the principal. “<I>Get off my daughter’s back.</I> The Landinghams didn’t have the resources to bring a suit against you, but I do. If I get one, and I mean <I>one</I>, hint that Daria is not being treated in the same way as she was before she became pregnant, I’ll have you up in front of the Board of Education so fast you’ll have whiplash.”</P> <P>“Wha --? How dare you threaten me!” Li stammered as Helen snatched the folder and her briefcase up and headed for the door.</P> <P>“You think I’m bluffing?” Helen turned back to face Li. “This isn’t a poker game on some rickety river boat, Ms. Li, this is my daughter we‘re talking about. <I>You just freaking try me</I>.”</P> <P ALIGN="CENTER">~~~~~~</P> <P>Quinn, Stacy and Tiffany sat at their usual table with their three salads and vinaigrette dressing on the side. The one thing that was out of place was Sandi. She was sitting one table away on the opposite side of the aisle, attacking her own salad with more anger than enthusiasm. </P> <P>“Doesn’t she know we’re having a meeting?” Tiffany asked in her slow cadence.</P> <P>“Yeah, she does,” Quinn said. She looked at her friend in her self-imposed exile and shook he head sadly. “She started acting like that when I asked her about having it.”</P> <P>“Why is that, do you think?” Stacy asked.</P> <P>“I don’t know, Stacy. I think that she might still be mad about what happened in that courtroom.”</P> <P>“Really?”</P> <P>“Buuuut, that was Friday,” Tiffany said with a frown. “Why is she still mad about that?”</P> <P>“I wish I knew, Tiffany. I really wish I knew.” Quinn sighed and looked back at her plate. “Well, I suppose we should get this meeting started.”</P> <P>“Without Sandi?” Stacy whispered.</P> <P>“Well . . .” Quinn turned and looked at the Fashion Club President. “Sandi? We’re gonna start the meeting.”</P> <P>“So? What are you telling me for?” Sandi said icily, then looked the other direction.</P> <P>“Well, you <I>are </I>the club’s president,” Stacy pointed out, trying to be helpful.</P> <P>“Oh really?” Sandi glared. “Looks like you’re doing just fine with your <I>vice</I> president. What do you need me for? Leave me alone.”</P> <P>“Eep!” Stacy squeaked and shrunk in her seat.</P> <P>“Um, well, okay then, I guess.” Quinn turned back to the other two girls. All three looked equally worried. “Okay, as the vice president of the Fashion Club, I hereby call this meeting to order, or whatever. I have an announcement that I want to make: I’ve decided to get a steady boyfriend.”</P> <P>Stacy and Tiffany looked at Quinn blankly for a moment.</P> <P>“You . . . You mean, you’re not joking with us?” Tiffany asked, looking confused.</P> <P>“No, I’m not. It’s a special thing to find someone so exclusive that you want to see them compatibly,” Quinn said. <I>Or something like that.</P> </I><P>“You mean you’re only going to date one guy from now on? And not any other guy?” Tiffany asked with some surprise. “You’re not going to get pregnant too, are you?”</P> <P>“Tiffany!” Quinn sputtered. “Of course not! This is just dating!”</P> <P>”Yeah, don’t need another knocked up Morgendorffer,” Sandi muttered loudly from her table.</P> <P>Quinn glanced over her shoulder at Sandi, then turned back to the meeting and glowered at the table.</P> <P>“Um . . .Yeah.” Stacy and Tiffany exchanged a glance. “Anyway, Quinn, think of all the gifts and cash prizes you’ll be missing out on!”</P> <P>“Yeah, “ Tiffany agreed. “Are you sure that you want to do this?”</P> <P>“Yes, Tiffany, I am.” Quinn looked up from the table and nodded.</P> <P>“So, who’s going to be your boyfriend?” Stacy asked.</P> <P>“Uh . . . Gee. I haven’t thought about that.” Quinn looked surprised to be getting the question. “I just kind of thought I’d know, you know?”</P> <P>“I know! Let’s make a list of qualifications!” Stacy pulled her note pad out of her coat pocket and started making notes. “Like he has to be at least three inches taller than you and drive a car with a leather interior.”</P> <P>“No moles.” Tiffany put in.</P> <P>“And no self-respect,” Sandi’s voice cut in from the other table.</P> <P>Quinn turned and looked over her shoulder to see Sandi angrily pushing her salad around her plate with her fork.</P> <P>“Sandi, I’m being serious here. I want to get a steady boyfriend and I want to pick the right guy.” Quinn decided it was time to try and offer an olive branch. “I could really use your help.”</P> <P>“Okay, here’s a suggestion,” Sandi sneered. “Why don’t you start with the freshmen and work your way up. You ought to be through the whole class by the weekend.”</P> <P>Sandi tossed her fork onto her plate, got up and stormed out of the lunchroom, leaving her tray behind. In her wake, Stacy and Tiffany were looking confused, while Quinn looked angry and hurt.</P> <P>“That was just so . . . wrong,” Tiffany drawled.</P> <P>“No kidding,” Quinn replied, watching Sandi leave. <I>This isn’t just wrong -- it’s un-Sandi. And </I>that<I> worries me.</P> </I><P ALIGN="CENTER">~~~~~~</P> <P>After school, Jane had returned from walking Daria home to find Monique, Max, and Jesse sitting in the Lane kitchen. Their discussion centered about Monique’s umpteenth rant about leaving the Harpies.</P> <P>“I swear, I’m really gonna do it this time,” Monique said as Jane walked in the kitchen. “I’m gonna start my own band, and the Harpies can go fish.”</P> <P>“How long have you been saying that?” Jesse asked. He looked up. “Hey, Jane.”</P> <P>“Hello, random freeloaders,” Jane cheerfully replied. “What brings you here so early in the afternoon?”</P> <P>“Waitin’ on Trent, like usual,” Monique said. “He’s asleep.”</P> <P>“What else is new,” Jane said as she dropped her backpack on the kitchen table and walked over to the refrigerator. “Last night run late?”</P> <P>“Or early,” Max put in.</P> <P>“Whatever,” Jane smirked as she opened the door and started rummaging through what little was there. “Hey, something I’ve been meaning to ask you guys. Someone in school was talking about a fight at the Zon on Friday night. You know anything about that?”</P> <P>“Oh, yeah,” Jesse said as he and Max started chuckling. “That’s got to be a new record for us. We didn’t even get tuned up.”</P> <P>“Really? I’ll have to ask Tom if he saw or heard anything.”</P> <P>“Your boyfriend?” Jesse asked.</P> <P>“Ex-boyfriend, actually. He’s with Daria now.” Jane looked suspiciously at a stack of cold cuts in plastic wrap, then closed the fridge and went in search of bread. “By the way, did he get the lyric book there in time?”</P> <P>There was a long, silent moment as Monique, Max, and Jesse exchanged looks that went from questioning to worried realization. The silence dragged out long enough that Jane turned away from her snack construction to see if she had suddenly become the only one in the room.</P> <P>“What?” Jane asked, seeing the expressions.</P> <P>“You mean that guy who brought the lyric binder was <I>Daria’s </I>Tom?” Monique asked.</P> <P>“Yeah. Why?”</P> <P>“Ooo boy. That‘s why I recognized him,” Monique whispered.</P> <P>“Man, no wonder Trent tore into him like that.” Jesse shook his head. “Probably a good thing the cops showed up when they did.”</P> <P>“They still coulda waited a little bit, man,” Max chuckled. “You’d’ve both owed me money.”</P> <P>“Uh, guys?” Monique looked from the two men to Jane and back again.</P> <P>The expression on Jane’s face was a mixture of shocked disbelief combined with building anger. Her cheeks and exposed right ear were turning an angry shade of red as her mind put together a theory on what had happened that Friday night.</P> <P>“Just exactly what the hell happened Friday night?” Jane demanded.</P> <P>Max gulped audibly. “Ya know, maybe we’d better go and get Trent,” he suggested, sliding off his stool and heading for the doorway.</P> <P>“Yeah,” Jesse agreed, following close behind. “He’s bound to be awake any time now.”</P> <P>They almost made it to the doorway before Jane shot across the kitchen, grabbed each of them by an ear and started pulling them back into the kitchen.</P> <P>“OW! Janey, c’mon!” Jesse whined.</P> <P>“AHH! That’s my earring!” Max yelled.</P> <P>“Get back in here!” Jane twisted her captive’s earlobes in such a way that they had no choice.</P> <P>“Jane, maybe --” Monique started.</P> <P>“<I>Shut up!</I>” Jane snapped, shoving Jesse towards Monique.</P> <P>“Man.” Jesse rubbed his ear, wincing in pain.</P> <P>“C’mere Francine!” Jane growled, yanking Max’s face close to hers. “Are you telling me that Trent <I>started a fight</I> with Tom?”</P> <P>“Well, not really! I mean they were arguing inside first and --” Jane twisted his ear, hard. “OW!! Jane, come on!!”</P> <P>“Jane,“ Monique calmly said. “Why don’t you let go of Max and I’ll try and tell you what happened, okay?”</P> <P>Jane pushed Max in Jesse’s general direction and looked harshly at the other woman. Max just rubbed his ear and wisely kept his mouth shut.</P> <P>“Okay, start talking,” Jane said flatly.</P> <P>“All right,” Monique began. “Trent was already in a rotten mood by the time we had gotten to the club to begin setting up. It looked like he’d already had a couple, but he wasn’t saying anything about why he was so pissed. When your Tom showed up with the book, Trent just kinda . . .” She shrugged. “Well, he just kinda blew up.”</P> <P>“Just ‘blew up,’ “ Jane echoed.</P> <P>“Yeah. Tom tried to keep it cool, but, next thing they’re yelling at each other, and the bouncer tells ‘em to take it outside.”</P> <P>“And someone felt obliged to start throwing punches, right?” Jane put one hand on her hip. “Who hit who first?”</P> <P>“Uh . . .” Max and Jesse looked at each other, while Monique looked at the counter-top.</P> <P>“Don’t bother.” Jane’s jaw ground as she stalked out of the kitchen. “I’ll freaking <I>kill</I> him!”</P> <P>Jane thought she heard Monique call out behind, but she wasn’t about to stop. She knew Trent was having problems dealing with Tom and Daria’s situation, but she would have bet her eyeteeth that it would never have gone this far.</P> <P>She stomped up the stairs two at a time, with every intention of waking her brother so he’d be fully conscious when she tore into him. She reached his door in four strides and shoved it open with a <I>slam</I> that should have had anyone else clinging to the ceiling. Trent, asleep on the bed, didn’t even twitch.</P> <P>“Trent, wake up!” Jane yelled as she hit the light switch with the side of her fist.</P> <P>“Hunh? Whazzit?” Trent mumbled from his bed.</P> <P>“Tell me it isn’t true, Trent!” Jane yelled. “Tell me that what the guys downstairs said isn’t true!”</P> <P>“Zizzntrue. Lemmesleep.” HE started to roll over, but Jane wasn’t finished. Oblivious to the junk on the floor, she crossed the room, grabbed Trent by the front of his shirt and yanked him upright.</P> <P>“Whoa!” Trent blinked against the light.</P> <P>The left side of Trent’s face was sported a large bruise around his eye colored with blacks, blues, reds, and greens. For an instant, Jane was glad that Tom had got in at least one good shot.</P> <P>“You bastard,” Jane whispered.</P> <P>“Janey, what the --?”</P> <P>“Don’t you ‘Janey’ me, you moron! I ought to sock you in your other eye!” Jane shouted into her brother’s face. She let him go with a shove and started pacing around the room. “I don’t believe you! I just don’t freaking believe you!! Tom does a favor for me and you’ve got to turn it into an opportunity to start a bar brawl! How could you be so damn stupid!”</P> <I><P>Aw, crap. </I>“I didn’t start anything. It just sort of . . . happened.” Trent shrugged.</P> <P>“Oh, it ‘just happened,’ did it? All of a sudden, for no reason, you guys are out in the street beating the crap out of each other?” Jane spun on Trent and threw her hands in the air. “You threw the first freaking punch and you’ve got the <I>cojones</I> to tell me that you didn’t start anything??”</P> <P>“No, I didn’t start anything -- he did! Well -- it’s complicated. Look, Janey --”</P> <P>“Don’t!” Jane cut him off. “Don’t you <I>dare</I> call me ‘Janey’ right now! You may have done the dumbest thing imaginable, you know that? Tom and Daria are having enough problems right now and you’ve just gotta throw another one on the pile, don’t you?” Jane started pacing again. “This is going to kill Daria, assuming she hasn’t found out already.”</P> <P>“Jane, I’m sorry,” Trent said quietly.</P> <P>“Sorry?” Jane gave a rueful laugh. “Trent, right now you are <I>way </I>beyond sorry! You <I>know</I> Daria and Tom are having problems with their parents! Hell, you were in the damn courtroom, and I’ve already told you how Jake and Helen blew up! Tom’s parents didn’t react any better than the Morgendorffers! Daria and Tom are looking for whatever kind of support that they can find, whether they admit it or not.”</P> <P>“Tom’s got money.”</P> <P>“It’s not money I’m talking about!” Jane stopped pacing and sat down on the edge of the bed. “I’m talking about emotional support! I’m talking about friends being there when they need them! What happened to ‘whatever support Daria needs, she’s got it?’ “</P> <P>“I meant that, you know,” Trent said, looking at his sister.</P> <P>“Then why did you get in a fight with Tom?”</P> <P>Trent just looked away. He had thought he’d had good reasons at the time, but he hadn’t been thinking so much as acting on impulse that night. His instincts told him that Tom was trouble for Daria, that he had no intention of staying around anymore than he had to. Trent’s anger at Tom for screwing over Jane had been very close to the surface lately, too. It boiled over when he thought he saw the same thing starting to happen to Daria, only worse.</P> <P>“Fine,” Jane said when Trent said nothing for a long moment. “You just sit there until you come up with a believable answer. Meanwhile, I’ve got to figure out how to tell Daria that her kid’s father got clobbered by my brother.”</P> <P>“I’ll tell her,” Trent offered.</P> <P>“No, you won’t!” Jane snapped as she stood back up. “You won’t go anywhere near Daria until I‘ve had a chance to talk to her first.”</P> <P>“I’m sorry, Janey,” Trent said as Jane walked towards the door.</P> <P>“Don’t call me that,“ Jane said over her shoulder as she left. “And I’m not the one that you have to apologize to.” </P> <P ALIGN="CENTER">~~~~~~</P> <P>That night at the Morgendorffer house found matters to be somewhat calmer than those at the Lane’s. Quinn was sitting at her usual spot at the table and poring over a list of qualifications that she, Stacy, and Tiffany had managed to work out for The Boyfriend Project. Quinn was still bothered by Sandi’s reaction during their lunchtime meeting as well as her behavior after that. Sandi had been totally closed off from everyone, only speaking when necessary, and then in short clipped sentences. Quinn had wanted to pursue the subject further, but with every attempt all she had gotten was the cold shoulder and a stony silence. When Sandi had stormed away for the third time that day, Quinn had decided to let the subject rest and approach it fresh in the morning.</P> <P>Unfortunately, the current dilemma was proving to be equally as frustrating.</P> <P>“Wow, I wish we could have found a way to break this down a little further.” Quinn sighed as she looked at the pages in front of her. “Looks, popularity, what kind of car he drives, his hair . . .”</P> <P>“You know, Quinn, looks and popularity aren’t really what’s important in a relationship,” Helen said from her usual place at the table.</P> <P>“Then what is?” Quinn asked.</P> <P>“The ability to fix major appliances,” Daria said as she walked up behind Quinn. She popped the tab on one of Helen’s instant breakfast beverages and took a drink.</P> <P>“Daria, are you sure you that you should be having that?” Helen asked with a cocked eyebrow.</P> <P>“So far it’s the only thing that I haven’t wanted to throw up all day,” Daria said as she sat down at Jake’s usual spot with the vanilla drink. “The doctor said it was okay, and Junior isn’t complaining any.” </P> <P>“Anyway, Quinn, what’s important is that you find someone that you enjoy being with,” Helen tucked her own newspaper off to the side. “Now, by ‘being with,’ I don’t necessarily mean ‘have sex with.’ Of course after the relationship has progressed for a few years --”</P> <P>“Mom! Eww!” Quinn wrinkled her nose.</P> <P>“Hey, don’t knock it till you’ve tried it,” Daria smirked from behind her can.</P> <P>“EWWWW!!”</P> <P>“Daria!”</P> <P>“What?” Daria tried her best to look innocent.</P> <P>“I <I>mean</I> someone to enjoy doing regular, everyday activities with!”</P> <P>“You mean like how I enjoyed Kyle taking me to <I>Le Yeast</I> last night?” Quinn asked.</P> <P>“I mean someone who you can get along with for more than one evening. Someone who can share your hopes and dreams, your trials and disappointments. Someone who you look forward to seeing day after, week after week . . .” Helen’s voice changed noticeably, making Daria and Quinn exchange a glance. “Month after month, year after year, the same old complaining about his father! God! Is he ever going to get over --”</P> <P>“Mo-oommmm!” Quinn cut in, having heard too much already. “That is so <I>boring!</I>”</P> <P>“Uh, not at all!” Helen shook herself back to the present. “That’s compatibility!”</P> <P>“I think I’ll finish this upstairs,” Quinn said with a disbelieving look at her mother.</P> <P>Helen slumped back into her chair as Quinn walked out of the room. That had not gone the way she had initially wanted it to.</P> <P>“Good job, Ann Landers,” Daria quipped. “Another satisfied customer.”</P> <P>“Thanks a heap. Don’t you have homework or something?” Helen asked flatly.</P> <P>“Nope.”</P> <P ALIGN="CENTER">~~~Wednesday~~~</P> <P>Jane and Daria’s usual after school stop at Pizza King had taken a slightly more interesting turn than usual. They had had to push their way inside through a line of boys that stretched almost to the end of the block. Inside Quinn was in the process of interviewing prospective boyfriends, and going through them almost as fast as they could file in through the door. The two girls had just gotten settled into their usual booth as Quinn had gone through Joey, Jeffy, and Jamie, all three of them leaving them with doubtful looks on their faces.</P> <P>“Wow!” Jane checked her watch. “Ten interviews in ten minutes. She really should consider a career in broadcast journalism.”</P> <P>“Tonight on <I>Sixty Seconds.</I>” Daria smirked as she took a bite of her chicken and pineapple pizza.</P> <P>“How can you eat that stuff?” Jane wrinkled her nose as she bit into her usual pepperoni and mushroom.</P> <P>“Hey, this is the first meal in three days I’ve had where I haven’t felt like puking at the sight of.” Daria swallowed. “My dad’s cooking not withstanding, of course. Damn morning sickness has <I>got </I>to go away sometime.”</P> <P>“Here’s hoping.” Jane bit off more of her own pizza, slowly chewed and swallowed. “So, heard anything from Young Thomas lately?”</P> <P>“Nothing since yesterday. I guess his car is still in the shop. I was going to ask him about that fight we heard about at the Zon.”</P> <P>“Yeah, I, uh, heard about that from the band last night,” Jane said slowly. “Actually, they were involved.”</P> <P>“Really? What happened?” Daria asked. “Nick and Max finally try to kill each other?”</P> <P>“Actually, it was Trent.” Jane hesitated for a long moment. “And Tom.”</P> <P>Daria sat upright in her seat and stared at Jane for a long moment.</P> <P>“What?” Daria asked with a surprised / calm sort of tone. “What do you mean Trent and Tom were involved? Did they break it up or something?”</P> <P>“Not . . . quite.” Jane was really beginning to feel uncomfortable. “Actually, they were the <I>only </I>two involved.”</P> <P>“Trent and Tom were in a fight with each other.” Daria’s expression may as well have been carved from stone, she was so unreadable. After one long, tense minute, Daria slid out of her seat and walked straight for the door.</P> <P>“Hey!” Jane got up out of her own seat and quickly caught up to Daria.</P> <P>She had plowed through the line, with Jane right behind her, crossed the parking lot and headed across the street. She was making a bee line for Crew Neck and, Jane knew almost for a fact, Tom’s house.</P> <P>“What exactly happened?” Daria asked sharply after about a block and a half.</P> <P>“Honestly, all I know is what Monique told me, okay?” Jane prefaced.</P> <P>“Okay.”</P> <P>“Obviously, Trent’s been in a mood about something all week, judging from this it’s most likely about Tom. Evidently, he’d had a few drinks by the time the band started setting up for the gig, and, according to Monique, Trent started in on Tom from about the minute he’d shown up. Trent starts yelling, Tom yells back, the bouncer tells them to take their discussion outside.”</P> <P>“Where they decide to fight it out,” Daria grumbled. “Wonderful.”</P> <P>“Actually, I don’t think the decision was very mutual.”</P> <P>“What do you mean?”</P> <P>“Welllll, Trent threw the first punch.” Jane sounded angry and disappointed at the same time.</P> <P>“<I>Trent</I> threw --?” Daria came to a screeching halt. “Why?”</P> <P>“I asked him the same thing.” Jane sighed heavily. “Evidently it’s ‘complicated.’ “</P> <P>“Complicated, huh?” Daria started walking again. “Well, let’s just find out how complicated things are, shall we?”</P> <P>When the girls finally got to Tom’s house, it was Elsie that answered the doorbell.</P> <P>“Oh, hi. I was kind of wondering when you’d show up.” Elsie stepped back to let them in, looking at Jane as she did so. “Your brother’s a complete nut job. You know that, right?”</P> <P>“I’m beginning to find realize that,“ Jane replied ruefully.</P> <P>“Where’s Tom?” Daria asked.</P> <P>“Up in his room.” Elsie gestured at the stairs. “He told Mom and Dad he was sick and ditched school yesterday.”</P> <P>“His car isn’t in the shop, is it?” Daria asked as Elsie led them upstairs.</P> <P>“Nope, just his pretty face.”</P> <P>“So he gave as good as he got?” Jane asked. Daria and Elsie looked back at her and she briefly explained about Trent’s black eye.</P> <P>“I thought he got in a couple before the police got there,” Elsie said as the trio topped the stairs.</P> <P>“Someone called the <I>police</I>?” Daria shot a stunned look at Jane.</P> <P>“Guess I forgot to mention that?” Jane said with a forced cheery tone.</P> <P>“Feeling sheepish, are we?” Daria glowered as she walked past Elsie.</P> <P>“Baaa,” Jane bleated as Daria knocked on Tom’s door.</P> <P>“Go away Elsie.” Tom’s voice was muffled by the door.</P> <P>“It’s Daria.”</P> <P>“Uh -- <I>No Tom aqui! No habla ingles!</I>” Tom’s voice shot up in pitch.</P> <P>“<I>Me placer&eacute; traducir. Ahora, abre la puerta, cerebro de burrito</I>.” Jane said with a smirk. (I’ll be happy to translate. Now, open the door, burrito brain.)</P> <P>“Huh?” Daria cocked an eyebrow at Jane.</P> <P>“I’ll tell you later,” Jane said as the door slowly swung open to reveal a downcast Tom.</P> <P>“Hi,” he greeted them quietly. The right side of his face was black and blue just under his eye and it looked like his upper lip on that side was somewhat swollen. He was carrying an ice pack in one hand.</P> <P>“Whoa!” Jane’s eyebrows went way up.</P> <P>“Tom, what the hell happened?” Daria asked, totally shocked. She couldn’t take her eyes of the huge bruise.</P> <P>“I fell out of my ivory tower?” Tom joked lamely as he turned and walked back into his bedroom.</P> <P>“Jane said you got into a fight with Trent.” Daria said as she and Jane followed him into his room. Elsie leaned against the doorframe behind them to watch.</P> <P>“Well, it would be useless to deny it now.” Tom sat down on the edge of his bed and put the icepack back up against his eye as Jane sat next to him.</P> <P>“Why?”</P> <P>“A question I’ve been asking myself a lot the last couple days.”</P> <P>“No more evading, Tom. Really, what happened?” Daria lowered herself into Tom’s desk chair. “Jane told me what she heard from Monique, now I want to hear your side of it.”</P> <P>“Well, after dropping you off at home, I delivered the binder like Jane had asked me to,” Tom began, putting the icepack down and rubbing the uninjured side of his face. “Trent started getting in my face and going on about how my mother just threw money at the problem to make it go away. I guess he was talking about the child support settlement. Then he started in on how I’m supposedly going to either ignore or abandon you and the baby after it’s born. He wasn’t really making a whole lot of sense and, no offense, Jane; I think he seemed a little drunk.”</P> <P>“That goes along with what Monique told me,” Jane said glumly.</P> <P>“Anyway, next thing I know, we’re yelling at each other and a minute later, the security guy is telling us to go outside with it. Well, we go, and once we’re outside I turn around, hoping to talk some sense to him and . . .”</P> <P>“Trent hit you,” Daria said flatly.</P> <P>“Well, yeah. Almost knocked me flat.” Tom shrugged. “Anyway, we go at it for a few minutes and suddenly, the rest of the guys from the band are pulling is apart. The girl what’s-her-name -- Monique -- tells me to get out of there because someone’s called the police.”</P> <P>“That would have been me, actually,” Elsie piped up from her place against the door frame.</P> <P>“I thought as much. After that, I got back in the car and we took off.” Tom shrugged. “The rest is history.”</P> <P>“Why did you hit him back?” Daria asked.</P> <P>“Huh?” Tom looked confused. “What was I supposed to do, let him beat the crap out of me?”</P> <P>“You could have turned around and walked away,” Daria said with a flat voice. “You could have cut your losses and not had your head handed to you.”</P> <P>“He seemed to have given as good as he got,” Jane put in.</P> <P>“That’s not the point, Jane. He could have got up and walked away and won the moral victory.”</P> <P>“Daria, you don’t understand,” Tom tried to explain. “I don’t like fighting anymore than you do, but Trent started it and I wasn’t sure what he had in mind to finish it with.”</P> <P>“But you didn’t have to get into a fight!”</P> <P>“Daria, you aren’t getting it! It’s a guy thing!”</P> <P>“A <I>guy</I> thing? What’s <I>that </I>supposed to mean?” Daria asked with a glare. “You felt you needed to defend your honor or something? What?”</P> <P>“It’s not just that. It’s . . .” Tom tried to continue his explanation but was caught fishing for a word.</P> <P>“Complicated?”</P> <P>“Well, yeah. Look --”</P> <P>“No, you look.” Daria stood up, her fists clenched at her sides. “You could have taken the hit, swallowed your male pride and walked away. You could have proven to him that you were the better person by not meeting him on his own level; then all this wouldn’t be happening. The only thing complicated I see about this whole thing is that you two decided you had to hose down the street with testosterone in a bid to see which one of you was the bigger idiot!”</P> <P>Daria turned and walked towards the doorway, catching everyone in the room competently at a loss. Elsie smartly stepped aside before Daria got there.</P> <P>“Daria!” Tom finally found his voice and stood up. “Wait I --”</P> <P>“Don’t even talk to me,” Daria said in a voice that was pure acid. Then she disappeared out the door and down the hall.</P> <P>“Well,” Tom said, sitting back down on the bed after a second. “I don’t suppose there was any way that could have possibly gone worse.”</P> <P>“Not really.” Jane confirmed.</P> <P>“I suppose I’d better go and apologize.”</P> <P>“Actually, you ought to give her some space for a while, I think,” Jane suggested as she stood up. “Give her a day to settle down.”</P> <P>“Probably a good idea, Tom,” Elsie said with a shake of her head.</P> <P>“Don’t worry, I’ll keep an eye on her. Later.” Jane left the room at a fast walk to catch up with her angry friend.</P> <P>“Thanks,” Tom said to Jane’s retreating back. He then flopped back on his bed and let out a long, tired sigh. “What a mess.”</P> <P>“No kidding.” Elsie walked over and sat down by her brother. “You know, you’re going to make a wonderful father.”</P> <P>“Thanks loads.”</P> <P ALIGN="CENTER">~~~~~~</P> <P>“Are you going to be okay?” Jane asked, finally breaking the silence a few blocks into their trip home.</P> <P>“Yeah, I’ll be fine.” Daria sighed. She was silent for a few paces, then sighed again. “I can’t believe Trent started a fight with Tom.”</P> <P>“Neither can I,” Jane agreed. “I didn’t think he had it in him.”</P> <P>“I really don’t think that Trent’s an idiot. Or Tom. It’s just that I wouldn’t have thought that either one of them would go so far as to get into a fight over, well, anything.” Daria’s shoulders drooped, as did her expression. “And then, they get into a fight about me, of all things.”</P> <P>They walked in silence for another block before Jane broke the silence between them.</P> <P>“Look, Daria,” she said, taking a deep breath. “I know there’s no excuse for what Trent did, but . . . In his own way, he really does care about you.”</P> <P>“I know.”</P> <P>“If it makes you feel any better, I gave him the same chewing out that you gave Tom.”</P> <P>“It doesn’t make me feel any better, but thanks anyway.” Daria looked up as they came to the intersection where Glen Oaks Lane turned into Howard Drive. “Jane, I think I’d really like to be by myself for a while.”</P> <P>“Yeah, no problem.” Jane looked at her friend for a moment. “You know, you can talk to me about anything, right?”</P> <P>“I know, Jane. But right now, I just need to think for a while, okay?”</P> <P>“Okay. If you say so.”</P> <P>“See ya.”</P> <P>“Later.”</P> <P>Jane walked backwards for a few paces, watching Daria as she walked up the street. The only other time that she had seen Daria like this was in the few days after she had just found out that she had become pregnant. She thought for a moment that she should have confronted Tom on her own, before involving Daria, but that probably would have made things more difficult in the long run. She realized that that may have been the same reason that Daria had come right out and told her about the kiss right away.</P> <I><P>If I had found out about that on my own later on, things would have been a hell of a lot worse,</I> Jane thought sadly. <I>We may never have spoken to each other again.</P> </I><P>Unbidden, Jane’s mind conjured up an image of herself totally alone. Not just an outcast, but totally unable to let anyone in ever again, drifting not just through school, but the rest of her life that way. Jane saw herself becoming so hard bitten that Penny would have looked like an old softy in comparison.</P> <I><P>No. No way,</I> Jane thought as she walked up the sidewalk to her front door. <I>I’d have dropped Tom like a hot potato before that happened! Daria would have never blown me off like that! Never!</P> </I><P>Jane swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat as she opened the door and walked in. On the way up the stairs to her room, she let her mind drift back into recent history. First, there was that stupid parade -- she should have known something was off kilter right then and there. She knew Tom was looking back over his shoulder, but she didn’t say anything. Daria would catch up or she wouldn’t, Jane knew. Somewhere deep down, though, Jane had been hoping that Daria would have.</P> <I><P>Holy crap. Where did that come from?</I> Jane asked herself as she topped the stairs. <I>Daria could take care of her self easily enough. I mean it was just a little paint. And yeah, it would have been cool if she would have tagged along, but . . .</P> </I><P>Jane shook her head and went into her room. She had been so worried about Daria over the past few weeks that her concerns were coloring her recollections of what had happened. Chuckling to herself over how crazy it sounded, Jane reached behind her dresser and pulled out the canvas that was her special project. She set it up on her easel and removed the sheet that protected it, taking a step back and looking at the vaguely human looking shapes that were barely started. One was reclining, holding something in it’s arms, while the other stood by their side.</P> <P>Jane could have realistically expected to have this painting finished in a couple of weeks if she had wanted to, but she was taking her time with it. It would almost be photo-realistic by the time she was done and she wanted it to be done right. She looked at the reclining figure on the bed, mentally superimposing the details of Daria’s face on the unfinished head.</P> <I><P>Daria’d probably be totally exhausted by the time everything’s over and done with,</I> Jane thought. <I>She’d be a wreck. But that’s not how these kinds of things get painted. Tom’d be a wreck too.</I> Jane’s mind put Tom’s face on the other figure. <I>Exhausted, nervous, bouncing off the walls. Both of them would be, really, but they’d be together.</P> </I><P>Jane frowned slightly at that one. <I>They</I> would be together.</P> <I><P>Damn, I’m doing it again! What the hell am I doing? They’re more made for each other than Tom and I ever were.</P> </I><P>Jane’s mind again drifted back to the few days after the kitchen fire at the Morgendorffers’ and all that crap about going out for pizza the night Daria had turned up on Jane’s doorstep. She could have almost have blown the whole thing off if Tom hadn’t brought up Daria’s mentioning an Italian film festival to him the day before. Jane wasn’t mad about going out for pizza, but she was angry that Tom was horning in. Jane had actually wanted to talk with Daria. She had thought that the pizza was a pretty good way to ditch Tom for a while and spend some “make-up-for-lost-time” time with her best friend.</P> <P>Later that night, when she went to Daria’s room to apologize for being such a schmuck with the wood sculpture and the drill, Tom was there, and Jane slipped back into ‘girlfriend’ mode. Jane had meant what she said about Tom and Daria getting along better, but it was still upsetting, but she wasn‘t sure why any more.</P> <P>Then, as summer was coming up, Jane set up her trip to the art colony that her mother’s friend ran out in the sticks. It wasn’t so much that she thought she needed the artistic influences, but it did put a fair distance between her and Lawndale. A couple of hundred miles of separation seemed to be just what the doctor ordered to objectify her point of view on things. It also served to get her away from what she had thought was the source of her problems -- namely Daria and Tom and their developing relationship. For a while it had worked; Jane was so busy getting settled in and set up that she hadn’t much time to think about either of them.</P> <I><P>Well, that’s not exactly true -- I didn’t give myself any time to think about them, </I>Jane corrected herself. <I>Except when I went to sleep, and then I was too tired to care. Well, almost.</P> </I><P>Her experience at the art colony hadn’t exactly gotten her away from her problems at home, but had actually dropped another one into her lap. Namely a slightly older brunette named Alison. (Jane winced at the thought. That name had been popping up far too much lately.) Their budding friendship had, at the time, been enough to get Jane to stop dwelling on the distraction of Daria and Tom. After a few days Jane had began treating Alison the same way that she had usually treated Daria and had actually started thinking of the other girl as a replacement for Daria.</P> <P>Then Alison had hit on her, throwing Jane for a complete loop. After returning to her cabin as fast as her legs could carry her, she didn’t sleep worth a damn that night, the better part of two bottles of wine not withstanding, and ended up doing a lot of thinking. One friend had betrayed her by taking her boyfriend, and another new friend had betrayed her by trying to cross a line Jane had never considered before. Jane had felt trapped, just like the painting of the woman in the safe she had done at the colony.</P> <I><P>Everyone had always seemed to want to butt in, </I>Jane thought. Daria had butted in on her relationship with Tom, though Jane was now convinced that it wasn’t deliberate. Tom had butted in on her relationship with Daria, though Jane now thought that she had practically invited him to do so. Even Alison had butted in, wanting to . . . Well, best not to think about that. It all ended up leaving Jane very angry -- at Tom, at Daria, at Alison, even at herself. As she thought about it all again, she realized that she wasn’t angry because Tom and Daria got together, but because Daria and Jane had come apart.</P> <I><P>I didn’t become a third wheel in my own relationship.</I> Jane remembered her words from back then. <I>I tried to change wheels for another one with the correct anatomical parts, but it wasn’t working because I already had . . . Oh boy.</P> </I><P>“I wasn’t pissed about Tom seeing Daria,” Jane said to the empty room with a flash of insight. “I was pissed about Daria <I>not </I>seeing me.”</P> <P>Glancing up at the painting, Jane replaced Tom’s face with her own in her mind’s eye.</P> <I><P>Oh, come on! Daria would tell you that you’re tired and you’re projecting, or something,</I> Jane thought with a huff. <I>Ask her tomorrow! You’ll see!</P> </I><P>“That may not be a good idea at the moment,” Jane mumbled in response to the last thought, remembering what the Daria figure in the painting would be holding when the painting was finished. “Not a good idea at all.”</P> <P ALIGN="CENTER">~~~~~~</P> <P>Daria’s walk home turned into a slow trudge. Her thoughts bounced between the idea that Tom had gotten into a fight over her and the idea that Trent, of all people, had been the one to start it. Yes, he’d been acting more out of sorts for the past ten days or so, but that he would go so far as to start something like this just didn’t compute. And why would he have to do it now of all times?</P> <P>She had long harbored a schoolgirl crush on her best friend’s brother. After their multimedia collaboration had gone downhill, the crush had abated somewhat. More precisely, it had transmuted. An unrequited crush had turned into a sisterly affection for the young man. Occasionally, though, her thoughts would turn to ‘what might have been.’ Now, there was a more disturbing tone to those thoughts.</P> <P>Daria honestly didn’t believe that Trent had a temper, since it had taken him some time to get to this level. And Tom was more inclined to work out the core of a problem by debate and discussion. Now she had to believe that, if physically provoked, he would react in kind.</P> <I><P>I have to figure out what really started this,</I> Daria thought as her house came into view. <I>There’s more to it than just male posturing, and I refuse to believe that this was about Tom blowing me and Junior off after. Trent would never . . .</P> </I><P>Daria shook her head. That was definitely not a place that she wanted to wander into tonight. She resolved to get Trent and Tom together in the same place and find out exactly what their beef with each other was. After that, they’d work it out one way or the other.</P> <P>With a deep breath and broad strokes of a course of action in mind, Daria walked the rest of the way home. When she got there, she saw that both of the trashcans had been knocked to the ground, their vile contents spread out over the driveway. Neither vehicle was in the driveway, so, unless someone had parked in the garage, no parents were home. That, in turn, meant Quinn was out -- and Daria was stuck cleaning up the mess.</P> <P>Walking over to examine her involuntary project, Daria already figured that she’d need gloves and a broom at the very least. Wrinkling her nose at the smell of rancid Thai peanut sauce, Daria immediately noticed something that normally should not have been there: an empty cigarette package.</P> <I><P>Quinn must have thrown it away,</I> Daria surmised, having discovered that her sister had recently started smoking. <I>She must have tried to hide it in the kitchen trash or something.</P> </I><P>Daria picked up the pack with two fingers and tossed it deep into one of the overturned cans. From the other, she heard the sounds of something scrambling around inside and bent over to look. The soft brown eyes of a gray squirrel looked back at her for a moment before the animal went back to his foraging.</P> <P>“Eat hardy, fella,” Daria said as she stood back up and started for the door. “The buffet is about to close.”</P> <P>She had barely gotten in the front door when she heard her father’s car pull into the driveway, coming to a halt with a screech of the tires.</P> <P>“Damn you kids!” Jake hollered as he stormed out of his car. “I’m gonna put up one of those hidden surveillance cameras!”</P> <P>“Subtle, Dad. Real subtle.” Daria started to go and find some rubber gloves when Jake’s startled yelp brought her back to the door. She saw Jake standing under the tree next to the driveway, practicing every swear word he knew at the top of his lungs. The gray squirrel was sitting unconcernedly on the branch, munching on something and ignoring Jake.</P> <P>“Yeah, <I>real</I> subtle.” Daria shook her head and started up stairs. <I>Let him clean up his own mess.</P> </I><P ALIGN="CENTER">~~~Thursday~~~</P> <P>Daria found Thursday evening in the Morgendorffer home seemed to be somewhat more tense than normal. It wasn’t so much that there was a lot going on, but more like Daria was radiating tension like a campfire radiated heat. Outwardly, she appeared to be her usual calm self as she made slow progress through the planning paperwork that Dr. Nelson, her OB-GYN, had given her several weeks ago. She found it very hard to concentrate in light of recently discovered events now occupying her mind. Her father contributed to the tension in his own way, dominating the kitchen’s workspace and assembling a large, live-capture cage trap and mumbling to himself the whole while. His reading glasses were perched on the end of his nose as he went from the instructions, then to the trap and back again. Daria figured he must have been serious if he was following the directions. </P> <P>Thankfully, Helen wasn’t doing anything to add to the tension as she emptied the dishwasher.</P> <P>“Daria, let’s pick a night for Tom to come over,” Helen announced as she closed the appliance’s door. “How’s Friday?”</P> <P>“Sorry, no good. It’s the day after Thursday.” Daria did not bother to look up.</P> <P>“Well, how about Saturday, then?” Helen asked, resigning herself to a long contest.</P> <P>“I’ll be gearing up for Sunday.” Daria tried to concentrate on the paperwork in front of her. She felt her back teeth start to grind.</P> <I><P>Well, now . . .</I> Helen ‘s eyebrow went up slightly as she noticed her daughter’s jaw tense up. “Daria, is there some reason that you don’t want to invite Tom over?”</P> <P>“Damn squirrels are nothing but rats with fluffy tails!” Jake interrupted, drawing Helen’s attention away from Daria so she missed the pained look that passed over her face. “Well, to catch a rat, you’ve got to think like a rat! Where’s the cheese?”</P> <P>Jake turned and yanked open the refrigerator, sticking his head inside and rummaging around. Quinn walked into the kitchen just in time to see Daria angle a caustic glance at Helen.</P> <P>“Mom, Dad, it’s official,” Quinn said formally, her hands folded together in front of her. “Jamie is my new boyfriend. Therefore -- “</P> <I><P>“Boyfriend??”</P> </I><P>Everyone jumped as Jake tried to stand up while still part way in the fridge, cracking his head on the shelf above. Items fell over noisily, but nothing fell out as Jake hastily freed himself. His reading glasses were somewhat off kilter and he rubbed the back of his head as he turned on his youngest daughter.</P> <P>“When did this deadbeat get to be your boyfriend?” Jake asked loudly. “Who is he? Helen, did you know about this?”</P> <P>“I heard about it just now, Jake. Just like you did.” Helen said with a frown. “Now just settle down and let Quinn finish what she was saying.”</P> <P>“I’m not going to stand by and watch our other daughter ruin her life, too!” Jake slammed the refrigerator door behind him and grabbed the trap by its handle. “I want to meet this guy, Quinn. I want to know everything about him and I’m gonna break his fingers if he so much as thinks about going too far!”</P> <P>Jake stomped out of the kitchen, still mumbling to himself, leaving Quinn and Helen looking worriedly behind him. Daria was doing her best to tune out the universe and refused to look up. Helen shook her head and started to turn back to Daria, but was interrupted by the telephone ringing.</P> <P>“Hello? Amy, hi!” Helen answered the phone. She continued to talk to her sister as she stood up and walked out of the kitchen. Daria continued to frown into her paperwork as Quinn nonchalantly walked up to her.</P> <P>“It was a very difficult decision,” Quinn said with a practic