Fan Art by John Berry and Liliane Grenier
DARIA: Well, they're pleasingly symmetrical. (Pause) And... they flatter the face, yet manage to avoid detracting attention from the outfit. (Pause. Meanwhile, Quinn's face is brightening from the praise.) In short, when I look at you, (smirks) I feel like I'm looking in a mirror.
(Pause. Quinn's expression changes to one of fury. She utters a sharp cry and lunges at Daria. Daria manages to roll away and jump off the couch just as Quinn hits it. She stands there, watching Quinn and smirking.)
***
(Cut to side shot of Daria and Jane, obviously from Andrea's P.O.V. Their bodies lengthen into snake-like forms, intertwine, and merge at the head. Around them, the lockers curve back and forth, as if swaying to rhythmic music.)
Amy and Upchuck by SRA
Joel by Kara Wild
([Upchuck] jumps off the stage and heads toward Amy, who still wears her seductive look. Cut to close-up Upchuck. He does his tongue rattle. Suddenly, from off screen left, the dish of flan splatters in his face.)
***
A guy stands behind the couch, propping his elbows upon it. He's mild-looking and scholarly, yet also has a subtle ruggedness that's attractive. Sports wavy light brown hair and a beard. [Okay, so my vision of Joel has changed a bit over time.]
Daria and Brittany by John Berry
(Close-up shot of a pencil lying on the ground, near one of Daria's boots. Cut to a wider shot of Brittany crawling over to pick it up. As she does so, she feels an unkind presence hovering overhead, and looks up. Cut to Brittany's POV -- Daria is gazing down at her with a menacing glare. resume wider shot. Brittany freaks out, drops the pencil.)
BRITTANY: *Eap*!! (runs to Kevin's desk, huddles against him.) Kevvy, I'm *scared*!
Quinn's Cheerleading Disasters by John Berry and Liliane Grenier
(The pyramid, unable to withstand the pressure, collapses, and the cheerleaders fall gracefully to the ground. Angie stands up, brushes herself off, and walks over to Quinn.)
***
QUINN: How hard can it be to cheer? *Anyone* can do it. All you gotta do is... (shakes her arms in pom-pom waving gestures.) and... (starts kicking her legs from side to side, then hops around a little.) See? No prob-- agh! (trips and falls on her rear end.)
Grandpa Barksdale by Kara Wild
Charles Howard Barksdale Jr., known as "Howard," looks as described in "None in the Family, Part One": long face, aqualine nose, amazingly focused eyes behind gold-rimmed glasses. The years have thinned his brown hair and turned it silver, and added some extra lines and flesh to his face.
Barry, Clarence, and Squiggley by Kara Wild
BARRY: You know how seriously *those* nerds take their mathletics. They'll crucify us unless we stick together. (raises his sash.) We must wear the Lawndale colors with pride!
CLARENCE & SQUIGGLEY: (raising their sashes) Here h-here!
(They click calculators in a salute, then butt heads, which causes all three to groan and stumble backward.)
Tom the Cheerleader by John Berry
TOM: Find anything incriminating?
DARIA: That depends...
(With a big smirk, she shows Tom the page she just looked at. Cut to close-up shot of a photo of Tom dressed in a school uniform, mid-leap in the air against the backdrop of crowded bleachers. Cut to wide shot: Tom instantly turns red.)
Daria and Quinn Fight by SRA
Quinn's Mug Shot by S.C.
(They continue to struggle against each other, oblivious, until they see Helen's angry face hovering over them.)
HELEN: Daria! Quinn! Get up! NOW!
***
QUINN: Wait!
OFFICER: What?
QUINN: I'm trying to remember which is my better side. I mean they're both good, but one's slightly better than the other, and I don't want the side shot to bring out any unexpected deformities that could come back to haunt me.
OFFICER: Miss, it's a *mug* shot.
QUINN: So? It's still a representative of *me* and I want it to look good.
[Note that S.C. has created also an updated version of this image and gone on to make mug shots of the other characters.]
Got Amy? by Roger E. Moore
Amy and baby by Kara Wild
Joel and baby by Kara Wild
Ryan Howard Barksdale Silverman by Kara Wild
When Quinn scrunched up her nose at the milk again, Amy sighed. "Quinn, honey, you've seen me breastfeed before."
"Yeah, but the milk, like, went into his mouth so it was all natural and I didn't have to see it. But that... from your breasts -" Quinn's face reddened and her gestures grew wilder as she tried to articulate her thoughts. "It's like your breasts are in the fridge, or something!"
